How to Make Friends in College (Even If You Missed Week One)

To make friends in college, sit near the same people in every class, join one or two things that meet weekly, and suggest something small to a classmate early on. Missing week one costs you far less than it feels like. How to make friends in college depends on repeated time with the same people, and that stays available all year.

This guide works for college and university students anywhere, with separate sections for commuters, international students and anyone who started late.

The short answer

Week one decides very little. In one US study, first-year friendships were still being sorted nine weeks in.
Your seat matters. Sit in the same place, near the same people, every time.
Aim for one friend on your course and one off it. UK students with both reported the least daily loneliness.
Commuting? Pick one day a week to stay late, and protect it.
Started late? Being new gives you a reason to ask for help. Use it while it lasts.

What you actually missed in week one

Less than you think. Early groups form mostly by accident: same corridor, same orientation table, same queue for free pizza. One study shows how random this can be. Researchers in Germany gave 54 first-year students random seats at a single introductory session. A year later, people who had sat next to each other, or even in the same row, rated their friendship as stronger. The authors concluded that "people may become friends simply because they drew the right random number" (Back, Schmukle and Egloff, 2008).

Those early groups keep moving, too. Jeffrey Hall followed 112 first-year students at a US university through their first nine weeks (Hall, 2018; University of Kansas, 2018). Students whose friendship moved up a level about doubled their time with that person and spent about half as much time with their other friends (Greater Good Magazine, 2018). So the sorting was still under way in week nine. The group that looks fixed in your first month may look different by the end of term.

You're also probably marking yourself too harshly. In research on the liking gap, first-year students sharing a dorm underestimated how much their dorm mates liked them, in some cases for months (Boothby and colleagues, 2018).

Your seat is a bigger decision than it looks

Sit in the same place every time, towards the middle, near someone else who's alone. If the room is huge, pick a row and stay in it. You want to be a familiar face before you've said anything.

Arrive five minutes early. The minutes before a class are the easiest social time of the day, because everyone is slightly bored and nobody expects much. These openers need no courage:

"Did that lecture make sense to you, or are we both pretending?"
"Have you started the reading, or is it still a rumour?"
"Do you know if the slides go online?"

After two or three of these, make an offer: "I'm doing the problem set in the library on Wednesday at two. Want to do it together?" A study plan is the cheapest invitation in college, because nobody has to admit they want a friend.

You do need that step. According to Greater Good's account of Hall's study, time together at work or school didn't measurably bring people closer, while relaxing and hanging out did. A lecture puts you in the same room as someone. The coffee afterwards is when the hours start to count. If you want the numbers, we've worked through how long it takes to make a friend.

Aim for one friend on your course and one off it

A 2026 analysis of UK student surveys by Wonkhe SUs split students by where their friends came from. The difference is striking:

Where your friends are	Students feeling lonely every day
On your course and off it	12.9%
On your course only	20.9%
Off your course only	19.9%
No friends at university	44.4%

About 5.5% of students in those surveys said they had no friends at university (Wonkhe SUs, 2026). This is a link and not proof of cause, because lonely people can also find friendship harder. As a target, it still makes sense. Course friends get you through deadlines. Other friends get you out of the building.

How to make friends at university after the clubs fair

The usual advice is to join everything. You end up on 14 email lists and go to nothing. Pick one or two, and look for three things: a weekly meeting, the same people each time, and a job to do. Theatre crew, the student paper, a sports team, a volunteering group and a society that cooks together all qualify. A job helps because you always have a reason to be there and something to say.

Most clubs take new people all year, whatever the sign-up table implied. Walking in alone is the hard part, so deal with it in advance. Message the contact on the club's page:

Hi, I'm a second-year and I've never been to one of these. Can I come on Thursday, and is there someone I should look for when I get there?

That last question does the work. It turns a room of strangers into one named person who is expecting you. Then go twice before you judge it. The second visit is the awkward one, because you're no longer new and not yet a regular. If rooms like that drain you, our guide for introverts has gentler options.

How to make friends in college as a commuter

Commuting removes the easy hours. There's no shared kitchen, no corridor, no "is anyone getting food?" at nine at night. Wonkhe's analysis found commuters, along with older, distance and postgraduate students, more common among those who feel furthest outside the student community. Hours are the missing piece, and you can rebuild some of them.

Choose one anchor day. Stay late on the same day every week, for a club, a meal or a study session, and arrange your travel around it. One full day on campus does more than five days of arriving and leaving.
Use your gaps. A two-hour gap between classes is your version of the dorm kitchen. Spend it at the same table in the same cafe, where people can find you.
Say it out loud. People may stop inviting you because they assume you've gone home. Try: "I commute, so I usually leave by five, but I'm around until nine on Wednesdays. Anyone want to get food?"
Find your route. Post in your course chat: "Anyone else coming in from [area]? Would be nice to have company on the 8:40." Forty minutes each way, three days a week, is four hours together.
Stay over sometimes. Once a month or so, after a late event, ask to sleep on a friend's floor. You'll get breakfast, which is often where the good conversation is.
Stay present online. On days you're off campus, keep up with the course chat. Be the one who asks what everyone else is wondering.

If you have a job or caring duties, a late day may be impossible. A weekly lunch at the same time works on the same principle.

If you're an international student

A rough first few months are common. In 200 interviews with international students in Australia, two-thirds reported loneliness or isolation, especially early on. The researchers described three kinds: missing family, missing your networks, and missing your own culture and language (Sawir and colleagues, 2008). No single new friend fixes all three, so expect to need different people for different things.

Keep your friends from home and the people from your country on campus. They understand things you won't have to explain. Then add at least one local. A survey of 1,527 international students in New Zealand found connections with local people played an important part in how well students adapted (Bethel, Ward and Fetvadjiev, 2020).

Ask the question only you can ask. "Can I ask something that may be stupid? Why does everyone here say that?" Locals tend to enjoy explaining their own place.
Cook. "It's [festival] at home this week and I'm making far too much food. Come and eat. You don't need to know anything about it."
Name the language thing first. "My English is slower than my brain, so give me a second." People relax when you say it before they notice.
Use the holidays. When campus empties, the people left behind are your people. Ask around to find out who's staying.
Ask about a buddy scheme. Many universities run one through the international office. A language exchange, in person or through HelloTalk or Tandem, is another way in.

If you started late, transferred or came back after a break

Being new gets you a few weeks of permission to ask for help, so spend it quickly.

Tell one person on your first day. "I started three weeks late and I'm lost. Who here actually understands this course?" People tend to enjoy that question.
Ask for notes and pay in coffee. That gives you a reason to meet and a natural end point.
Look for others outside the main stream. Transfer students, exchange students, people who changed course and people back from a year out are all starting from a similar place. Ask your department or student union whether a group exists. If it doesn't, start a chat.
Ask to be mixed up. If a lecturer assigns project groups, ask to be put with people you don't know.

Every new term is a small week one: new classes, new seats, and people looking around for someone to sit with. If this term went badly, the next one starts soon.

No friends at college by second year

It happens, and it's more fixable than it looks. Start with where your time is going. If you go home every weekend, or most of your energy goes to friends from before, you may have what researchers call friendsickness: being preoccupied with the loss of, or change in, your pre-college friendships. In a small study of 70 students, it went along with more loneliness and lower self-esteem at college (Paul and Brier, 2001). You don't need to drop those friends. Try staying around for one extra weekend a month and see what happens.

Online spaces can fill some quiet weeks, and how to make friends online covers the options. Rimeso, a free Android app built around a small circle and a daily question, is one of them. People you can sit next to are the better bet while you're on campus.

If you feel low most days, or it's affecting your sleep or your work, use your university's counselling service. You don't have to be in crisis to go. Our guide on how to deal with loneliness may help too.

One week of small moves

Each of these takes a few minutes. Try them in order:

Monday: Sit in the same seat as last time and say one thing to the person next to you.
Tuesday: Message one club and ask who to look for when you arrive.
Wednesday: Invite one classmate to study, with a place and a time.
Thursday: Go to the club, find your named person and stay to the end.
Friday: Eat one meal with someone else, even if you have to ask, "Mind if I sit here?"
Weekend: Stay for one thing on campus, or invite someone to something near you.

Some of this will fizzle. Run the same week again next week, because the second try with the same people is where it starts to work.

💡 Try this: after any good conversation, add one follow-up within a day: "Good luck with the lab tomorrow." It takes five seconds and shows you were listening.

Frequently asked questions

Is it too late to make friends in college?

No. First-year friendships are still shifting weeks into term, most clubs accept new people all year, and each new term brings new classes and new seats. Pick one weekly thing and keep going back.

How do commuter students make friends?

Choose one day a week to stay late on campus, spend gaps between classes at the same table, look for others on your route, and tell classmates when you are around. One full day gives you more repeated time than five days of arriving and leaving.

What should I do if I have no friends at university?

Start small this week. Sit near the same person in class, ask one club who to look for when you arrive, and invite one classmate to study. If you feel low most days, talk to your university's counselling service as well.

How can international students make friends with local students?

Keep your friends from home and add one local through something that repeats, such as a club, a language exchange or a shared kitchen. Ask how things work here, invite people to eat food from home, and tell people when you need a moment with the language.

Sources

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If you're struggling right now: Rimeso and this article aren't a substitute for professional care. If you feel unsafe or in crisis, please contact your local emergency number, or find a free, confidential helpline in your country at findahelpline.com.